Sweet Sassy Molassy
by Trisforce
Summary: Sam is home reading, while Dean and Cas go out and watch a new movie. Castiel chooses the movie, and Dean doesn't like it one bit, but it's Cas who seems to ruin the movie. And then after, they go and look at the stars. Bad summary. Many fandom references. Was sappy but turns to smut. Idk. It kinda was a crackfic but idkidkidk. Dean/Cas. Includes Busty Asian Beauties.


**This is kinda a crackfic. BuT I MEAN. Idkidkdik. . here you go H. Btw this contains many fandoms and spoilers for Allegiant and Vampire Academy and ****_I wasn't going to smut but I smutted yolno._**

* * *

There was once a time when Dean and Castiel went to see a movie in the movie theaters to distract themselves from their lives at the said moment. Sam was home, catching up on the last Divergent book,_ Allegiant_.

"Dean, Cas. Get out of the house, this book is killing me and I'm going to be up all night crying. I can just tell. Please leave so you don't have to hear me yell at Tris." Was what Sam said, clutching a Kool Aid in his hand, glaring at the orange book.

What Dean heard was, "Dean, Cas, go out and have a hot date while I'm crying over a sixteen year old girl being stupid." and then Dean added, "and take my AMC theaters card, because you know I'm loaded and you know.. Cas wants to spend time with you."

"That's a good idea, actually. What would you like to do, Dean? Go to a bar?" Cas recommended, looking at Dean from across the room.

Dean hid the smile from his face, grunting. "Yeah."

Sam looked up at both of them. "I'll be in Chicago, then. Off with you guys."

* * *

Dean and Cas walked out of the house, Dean opening the door for himself and sitting down in the driver's seat and turning on a Metallica song and Cas looked at him.

"How drunk are you planning on getting, Dean?" Cas asked, watching him push the keys in the ignition and sighing.

Dean huffed like before, looking at Castiel and setting the car to drive. "Not at all, Cas. We're going to see a movie."

"Oh," he said, the 'O' lingering on his face for longer than necessary. "I'd enjoy seeing that one new movie… Oh! _Vampire Academy_."

"No, Cas...No." Dean sighed, driving down the road.

"Why ever not? It looks good." Castiel protested, raising his voice by four notes, smiling.

"It's because I wanted to see _Robocop_. " Dean glanced at him, huffing at his smile.

"Come on, Deany-" Cas purred, tilting his head to the side.

"No, Cas. I want to see Robocop."

"But Vampire Academy looks so good-"

"No, Cas." Dean raised his voice, stopping the car abruptly and glaring at him.

* * *

Dean flared his nostrils in frustration and handed the lady the card. She was brunette with a ring through her lip, smiling at both of them. Castiel was hung on Dean's left arm, kissing his neck in anticipation and blushing like a ninny.

"_Vampire Academy_." Dean grunted, looking at Cas.

"Here you go. Enjoy your movie." The girl snickered, hanging them Sam's card and their two tickets.

"I will hate you forever," Dean sighed, walking to the popcorn station and buying some, while Cas stood closely behind him, hands in his back pocket.

"You can't hate me, Dean. You never have and you never will." Cas whispered in his ear, somewhat seductively. The man set the popcorn down, with Dean paying him and as he reached for it, Cas grabbed it with a smirk. "Even though I know you'd like to, it's just impossible."

"Stop being so cocky. You got your movie, now stop teasing me." Dean mumbled to where only Cas could hear, trying to make an unreadable face.

Cas mumbled something in Dean's ear, the light humming ringing in his skull. It was Enochian, and Dean barely knew what it meant, but he could notice the one word that pulled the whole sentence together.

"Stop," he whispered, blinking at him.

"Okay," Cas smiled, eating some of the popcorn and walking with Dean into the showroom.

* * *

"Dean, be quiet. This is the movie trailer to that book Sam is reading," Cas said, poking Dean's chest as he looked up at the screen.

"The die-a-virgin thing?" Dean chuckled, watching a girl get panicked over being unique and he didn't really care, yadayada- "is that the guy from _Underworld_?!"

"Yep." Cas sighed.

"Oh my g-"

"Dean." Cas snarled, glaring at him. "No blasphemy."

"Right, sorry Cas." Dean chuckled, lifting a straw to his mouth. He'd bought them both a large slushee, a blue raspberry one because Dean liked it more, and Cas only likes it because it's cold. He doesn't favor the taste too much, so it meant Dean got most of it. It always was alright, though, because Cas barely tasted anything and when Dean always leaned in to kiss him, his boyfriend tasted like his favorite slushee, instead of his normal taste.

Dean had to admit, there were many perks of having a boyfriend with barely any taste buds. Especially the days when Sam was out, and they had spare whipped cream and peanut butter in the fridge.. it made some fun times, all of which Sam would never be aware of, of course. Sam would be scarred for dear life.

"I love you." Castiel said randomly, pulling Dean into a soft kiss, wrapping a hand around his neck lightly. He then pulled back and lingered over his lips, looking him in the eyes.

"I love you too," Dean murmured, keeping still. Cas then bit his bottom lip, not letting his tongue nor his lips touch the soft flesh. Dean mewled a bit, trying to push into Cas's touch. He tasted like the drink, as predicted, and Cas smiled into the kiss once again, battling each other's tongues in the slowest and quietest way possible. They didn't want to disturb anyone in the theater, even though only two other couples were present and they weren't making noise.

"What's up with you today, Cas?" Dean asked, stroking Cas's cheekbone softly, enjoying the amount of facial hair there. Neither bothered to shave all day, and even though Dean's wasn't as noticeable as the blue eyed one's.

"I'm just…" Cas mumbled, "I was trying to hide it all day, and when Sam told us practically we could go out on a date, I kinda exploded with joy."

Dean raised a brow, half lidding his eyes and smirking at him. "I know. I want to hear the words escape your lips, and not in Enochian either."  
Castiel grinned, leaning up to Dean's ear and whispering in a seductive purr, "I'm horny for you,"

Dean smiled and looked up. "H-hey Cas, the movie's starting."

"I think they should date," Dean mumbled under his breath as Lucy sucked Rose's neck.

"You're five minutes into the movie, Dean." Cas looked at him, arm on the armrest and his fingers pressed to his temple. Dean's arm was wrapped around Cas's shoulder's snugly, pulling him closer.

* * *

"Are you going to do this during the whole movie?" Castiel asked, obviously annoyed at all of Dean's little slurs. "I just want to watch it and get it done with."

"Well, duh. You're making me watch a movie I don't want to see," he snarled back.

"Then you go and see_ Robocop_." Cas sighed loudly, knowing Dean wouldn't.

"Maybe I will-"

"You won't get celebratory sex then, afterwards." Cas smirked to the screen, avoiding Dean's emerald eyes.

"Whatever."

* * *

Dean practically watched Castiel throughout the whole movie then, admiring all the little things he did when he was so interested in a fictional world. He's seen him read before, and it was practically the same, but then again...not really. His eyes twitched when something exciting happened, his lips faintly moving every time something that pissed him off happened. Dean hummed slightly, handing the drink to his boyfriend. He took it, and opened the lid.

"What are you doing?" Dean asked, creasing his brows.

"Drinking," Castiel looked at him. "Yeah-" he lifted the unlidded cup to his mouth, drinking from it.

"Don't tip it too far-"

Too late.

Cas had the blue drink dumped all over himself, him making a super embarrassed face and letting out a whale-ish sigh."Fucking great."

Dean chuckled a lot, having to cover his face and pointing at him. "Cas," he said between laughs, "I told you." He tried to stop laughing when he heard his boyfriend cuss, because that was important. Castiel only cursed on few occasions- when he was royally pissed, when he was embarrassed, or in Dean's bed and he couldn't scream (and he preferred to scream-). So Dean took into importance that he was embarrassed.

"Awh, Cas, come on. You just spilled shushee on yourself, don't beat up over it."

Castiel looked at him, pouting. "Most humans don't dump things on themselves. Unless they're babies."  
Dean smiled a bit, lifting a hand to his face and raking his hair. "Baby." He wiped his hand on his pants, getting the cold drink off of them. It was sticky, too, and now he felt bad. "Come on, let's-"

"We can't go home. Sam's there and he'll figure out we were on a date." Cas sighed, lifting his arm to his wet face and wiping it off, sighing once again, quieter.

"Oh yeah.. I'll go into the bathroom and get towels, then." Dean said, getting up and walking out, past the 3D-glasses garbage and the confections stand, making a right turn into the mens bathroom and pulling down towels, wetting a few and getting dry ones. He glanced in the mirror, offering a small smile to himself and sighed. "Look at what Cas has got me in to," he chuckled.

He walked out, setting his lips to the side and walking back in the room and saw the two characters, the brunette and the hefty-ish male kissing. Dean sat down again, distracting his eyes and gawking at Cas. "Hey, babe. Look at me."

Cas turned his head, raising his brows as in to snapping into reality. "Yes, Deany?"

Dean scoffed lightly, starting to wipe Castiel's face with a smug grin. "You have a little something on your face."

"Oh yeah," Cas looked back at the screen, not moving his head.

Dean had to admit, Cas's jaw looked great at this angle, and he was too tempted not to kiss it, so he leaned in slowly, humming slightly.

"Sweet sassy molassy~"

Dean's eyes widened, looking at the screen with a ridiculous face, seeing some sort of slow sex scene going on. After a few moments, he glared at the screen, seeing as the cockblocked him in a way. It was demeaning.

Castiel looked at him and chuckled, shivering slightly. As first, Dean thought he was uncomfortable with the scene, then he realized his trenchcoat was still soaking wet. He forgot about it, honestly.

"Cas, take off your coat." Dean whispered, kissing his jaw lightly like he was anticipating to, lingering on his skin.

"No, Dean..I'm fine. I'm not cold, really." Cas said, wrapping his hands around his body.

"Don't be ridiculous," Dean huffed, taking off his leather jacket that he was wearing. "Please? I don't want you to be cold.."

Cas rolled his eyes, looking at the screen and taking off the brown coat, wrapping Dean's leather jacket over him.

"Better?" Dean asked, raising a brow.

"Better," Castiel mumbled, smiling at him.

Dean half-smiled back, wrapping his hand around Cas's shoulder and pulling him closer. "There's not long until this movie is over, correct?" He asked Cas, kissing his head.

"Not long, I believe."

* * *

"That was the gayest movie I've ever watched." Dean said, arm still draped around Castiel lazily as he walked out of the showroom.

"Dean?" Cas asked, arms snug around Dean's sides as they walked past the confection stand. "..Are we not going to see Robocop?"

Dean raised his brows, smiling openly. "You still wanna watch it?"

Castiel nodded sheepishly.

"Okay. I'll use Sam's card to pay for it." He said as he walked to the teller. "Two tickets for Robocop."

She swiped the card, sighing. "You're short by $9."

Dean bit his lip and looked at Cas, raising a brow. "Cas, do you have nine bucks?"

Cas shook his head with a pouted face. "No."

"Dammit." Dean groaned, and after a few minutes he got the card back and they were sitting in the Impala, looking at each other.

"We still have all night before Sam goes to bed." Cas said, making an unreadable face. "Let's drive around and park somewhere and look at the stars. I know how much you love doing that. And I love it too."

Dean felt his heart warm up at the thought of it, starting the car and driving. "Are you suggesting that we park nowhere and gawk at stars all night? What about morning?"

"We can walk around the city and watch the sun rise. I know how you love that too." Cas smiled, grabbing Dean's arm lightly.  
Dean refused to look at him, watching the road (for once-). "Deal."

Cas looked out the window, gawking at the dark sky. It reminded him of home, somewhere he couldn't go back to..He didn't want to at the moment, either. It was fun being on a date with Dean, something they couldn't enjoy often without Sam wondering things.

* * *

Dean pulled over and got out, pulling out a blanket from the trunk and tugging Cas out, looking at the cement below them. "We can identify constellations." He smiled, pointing up. "Isn't that the Big Dipper?"

"That's not a constellation, nimrod." Castiel giggled, laying down and pulling Dean with him. Dean wrapped the soft fleece blanket over them, wrapping his arms around his waist.

"I love you." Dean hummed, kissing his cheek. He loved the scruff there, still to this moment, as it grew a tiny bit more since earlier.

"I love you too, Dean. More than the stars." Cas glanced at him. He then pointed up at the midnight sky, "that's the Aries constellation."

"That ram looking thing?" Dean asked.

"Mhhmmm."

* * *

Dean smirked, rubbing his hips against Cas's in a desperate need. "How much do you want me, Cas baby?" He mused against his ear, running their jeans together so hard into Cas's prominent hips it almost hurt. He almost loved grinding against those goddamned hips, so perfect and only for his use.

"Really, badly.." Cas gasped, digging his hands into Dean's blonde hair.

Dean planted a short, sloppy kiss on Cas's hot lips, then got up randomly and walked to the trunk of the impala, grabbing a magazine then landing over Cas again, laying it on his face.

"What do you suspect me to do with your Busty Asian Beauties magazine, Deany?" He mused, opening it and grinning.

"You're going to be my girl tonight, Cas. We haven't done much frottage with them, and we have all the time in the world with Sam gone. Just...fill my dirty pleasures," he mewled, hand sliding down his clothed chest and tugging at the zipper of his jeans. "I'll make it fun. Please?"

"But.. what do I do?" Cas asked, voice lowering.

"Find your favorite picture in there and mimic it. I'm not even picky." Dean mused, pulling his pants down.

"Okay~" Cas hummed, leaning up to take his shirt off and grabbing at his chest, moving his fingers in weird motions. "Like this, Dean?"

"Any way you like," Dean mused, kissing his boxers with a hot breath, teasing him.

"Dean-"

"Louder, Cas. We're out in the open."

"Dean-!" Cas growled, pivoting his hips upward.

"Better." Dean mused, tugging just enough of his boxers down to expose him, breathing on his skin. He looked at him for a moment, then took him in his mouth, swirling his tongue on the most sensitive parts he knew of. Cas took a loud breath in, breathing it out shakily.

"De-"

"Shut up." Dean snickered, taking his mouth off of his cock with a loud pop, saliva dripping from his pink lips. "Or beg."

"You're really demanding-" Cas protested, closing his eyes, pivoting his hips back up to Dean's touch, trying to choke him almost.

Dean moved him against his the inside of his cheeks, pretending to gag. "Hmmmf-"

"Dean~" Castiel mewled.

Dean looked up, almost thinking Cas was bored with this so he stopped. "Cas," he mused, inching up to his face. "You need to be walking tomorrow morning, so I can't fuck you so hard."

Cas mumbled something.

That damn Enochian.

"What does that mean~?" Dean asked, kissing at his neck softly, leaving very faint pink marks.

"_I want you to fuck me inside out_." Cas growled, tugging Dean's shirt off. He kissed the protection sigil there, hand slithering down his side. "Please?"

…"No, Cas."

Cas handed Dean the magazine, smirking. "What do you want me to look like, Deany-boo?"

Dean grinned, then blushed sheepishly. "None."

Castiel raised his eyebrows. "Hmm?"

"I ...want to lo-ok like one.." Dean mumbled, moving his body a bit to where he was sitting on Cas, even feeling him through his jeans. "But... I'm not sure how. I'm not the ..submissive type.."

"Do it like this," Cas smiled a bit and unzipped Dean's pants, rubbing him through his tight boxers, enjoying his face change. "Like that, yeah," he said as he leaned up on him to look him in the face and sit down comfortably. "Then you kinda.." Cas pulled Dean free, smoothing his palm out on him and kissing his jaw.

"Cas-"

"I'll be gentle.." he mumbled, stroking both of them in one hand motion.

"Cas-"

"Shh_hhhhh_," Cas mewled in his ear, kissing his neck. Dean shifted a bit, biting his lip and whimpering. His motions got teasingly slower, making Dean mewl more.

"I'm going to fucking kill you-" Dean hummed, rocking his hips to the timing of Cas's hand.

Cas mumbled something again, but this time it wasn't anything Enochian.

"Sweet sassy molassy," Cas smirked in his ear.

"Jesus fucking christ, Cas!" Dean screeched a bit, feeling the pit of his stomach tighten a bit, but refusing to cum all over Castiel like that. It was just..surprising.

"Hmmm?" Castiel started mumbling Enochian again, driving Dean out of his mind for what seemed like centuries before he came all over Cas's hands, groaning against teeth-nibbling kisses.

"I hate you," Dean groaned, kissing Cas's forehead.

"I know."

* * *

"Do you want me to buy you something?" Dean asked, walking into a gas station.

"Weren't you just complaining about not having 9 dollars?" Castiel asked, unlocking their hands and grabbing a water bottle from the freezer.

"I have 5 bucks. I didn't feel like scraping money together to see a remake." Dean chuckled, grabbing some Tic-tacs.

"Oh."

* * *

"Where have you two been?" Sam asked, wiping his eyes and sitting up from the couch.

"Out, like you recommended." Dean sighed, tossing his jacket on Sam.

"Hey, Sam…" Castiel asked, standing in the middle of the room. "Where's the book?"

Sam groaned. "I incarcerated it. I know I hated Tris, but I didn't want to see her die."

Dean chuckled, opening a beer bottle. "Wow Sam. You're such a geek."

"Am I? Because I know you took my movie card and bought two tickets to see _Vampire Academy_."

Dean glared at Castiel. "How does he know that?"

Sam laughed. "The movie ticketer called me. She thought you guys were a fraud. I also took the money out of it so you couldn't see _Robocop_."

Dean wiped his face in his hands, embarrassed. God dammit, world. "Sweet fucking sassy molassy."

Cas stood there chuckling. "I think this is what you get for wanting those two girls to be dating."

"Fuck off."


End file.
